Have you ever thought of how your words can hurt others? Do you think twice of what you speak? How can you be nice? How can one learn the art of presenting the thoughts? I never realized importance of all these things till the time I failed to express what I meant. I failed to express the feeling of love. This made me realize that even a writer fails to express the art of expression.
I am someone who always managed to hold his pride and ego above anything. However, I never realized where it lead me today. Today, I failed in expressing the things which I wish to say because my principles taught me something else. How difficult it is to find a balance between the both, one side it is your principles by which you live; second is the person whom you love and so not wish to leave. She was there waiting for me to give a second chance and I, instead of being happy just ruined by telling something which made no sense to me.
She was still sitting there waiting for me and I went away without even giving a second look. She was there to hear me and be with me all over again. She was there looking into my eyes telling me I love you and what I did was looked straight into her eyes telling I am not serious.I mislead her, I was rude to her, I somewhere made her feel insulted for loving me. However, this does not end here, after all this I expected her to be friends with ,e again. I have never thought being standing right in front of her I spoke everything that was not rude but insensitive.
She was still sitting and telling me sorry for asking as for her she thinks she ruined the friendship. How do I explain to her that it is me who is responsible for everything.
I never realized how some strong opinions and unidirectional thing can change your mind so much. I never realized to be best friends with your second personality is the worst thing you can ever do. I never realized what I did was wrong to what level. All I know today that I need to live with a lifelong of regret of hurting the one who loved me so innocently.
If this is what you call love, I wish I can die for this love again and again.